Our brother would have been 52 years old today-wow. Unfortunately, he ended his life in 1999 at the mere age of 39, which seems so incredibly young to me now. Suicide is such a hard concept and such a confusing one, even if you do have training in mental health. And no matter of the training, when it hits so close to home, the training and education doesn't matter anyway. The internal struggles that he faced were unknown to me.
Kenny was a quiet man; tall and slim and handsome. One of his daughters and my nephew look just like him, and it brings me a sense of peace to see them or see photos of them. I will never forget when he showed up at my graduation from UK; I was thrilled and so surprised.
When Kenny died, we chose to donate his organs. I remember sitting across the table from the KODA (Kentucky Organ Donor Association) representative, along with my mom, dad, and both of my sisters, thinking that he would have wanted us to do this. Life truly comes around full circle, as I am now working in the transplant center in the hospital where he died.
Today I wonder what he might be doing, what he what have looked like with a little grey in his hair :) I miss you big brother, and I think of you every day.